Do I procrastinate or is that I am being a shitty dad?
My daughter has asked me to build her a couple of items over the summer. She has wanted a toy chest and a small book shelf that she can put on her desk. I haven’t built them yet.
Her ideal toy chest is a hinged top open, it is relatively simple enough. She plans on using this to put her American Girl dolls and different items she has accumulated related to the doll. As an aside, I can’t believe how much these American Girl doll items cost.
Her ideal book shelf is small and would sit on her small desk. She would put her books in there that she is currently reading. I have tried to encourage her to read more this summer as she breaks from school but to no avail.
Am I Being a Shitty Dad or do I just procrastinate?
Last month, I wrote an article about 28 hacks to improve every day. One item that was highlighted for me was do not procrastinate, I am not there yet.
I told her at the beginning of her summer that I would build her toy chest and within the last few weeks that I would build her bookcase. She was very excited to ask me to build them and I enthusiastically said yes.
Our summer has been busy (excuse) either camping or going out of town for something. Every weekend we are in town, we have been running around buying things to replenish from our travels (excuse).
While working at my old job, I would get home at 5:15, eat supper, play for an hour than my son would go down to bed, I couldn’t do it then (excuse). My new job I will get home at 4:15, most days so that gives me an extra hour each evening to make things happen with my family.
What effect is this having on my Daughter?
This is the part where I believe I have passed the procrastinate stage and entered the shitty dad stage. There aren’t an endless amount of things I can teach my daughter, growing up with a brother I don’t have a lot of experience growing up with a girl. She is going to have questions about certain things that I am not going to be able to have the perfect experience to assuage her fears.
I missed an opportunity to teach her something here.
When you say you are going to do something (especially to your children), Dad Up and do it. I would expect the same of her.
I can do research on “the talk” or “the changes” and relay those to her but if I tell her something now and don’t follow through, all of my words are empty.
Common knowledge has it that many girls grow up to marry someone like their father. My father-in-law is a mechanic and I am an accountant, but there are many similarities between us. This gives the “marry someone like their father” credence a little validity in my life.
Would I want my daughter to marry someone who couldn’t keep their word?
Would I want my daughter to marry someone who made more excuses rather then got things done?
Would I want my daughter to marry someone she couldn’t count on?
I wouldn’t want either of those things for my daughter, so why am I doing that to her.
Procrastinate no more, time to Dad up!
At the end of the day, my daughter (and my son) needs a strong male role model in her life. The choice is simple, either be it or don’t.
I remember the first time I held her, the promises going through every dad’s head have to be the same. One of the things I promised her was that I would never let her down. I have let her down twice now by saying I will build something for her and not do it.
I am not even close to a trained carpenter, my forts were not tornado resistant but at this point that doesn’t matter. All that matters is fulfilling my word to my daughter.
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